{a life in food under the banner of faith}

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Blueberry Cornmeal Breakfast Cake

For those of you that get a little weirded out by someone’s personal faith, perhaps this post is not for you.  That’s okay.  I figure we're all grown adults here.  Odds are I won’t make a habit of it and I promise not to start infiltrating your weekly email with digital tracts.  I've also conveniently placed all questionable content in between the pretty pictures that you likely originally came for.  Since I've done my best to forewarn and protect you hopefully we can still be friends.  Father's Day is just around the corner and for the moment I need to have a somewhat public discussion with mine.  Why I feel the need for it to be public I don’t know.  Nor do I think it really matters. Certainly you have your very own unique and specific ways of figuring out your life.  Writing, praying, and basically talking my best friend to death are how I process both my own world and the bigger one.  This season is a weird, wonderful one of wrestling through a lot of insecurity and indecisiveness to figure out what’s next.  Obviously the written portion of that processing happens out loud right here.  I'll likely regret it in a week but sometimes you just need to put pen to paper to feel like you truly got it out of your system, you know?  That simple act frees my mind up to move on to the next.  If you need a piece of cake to comfort you through it, I made this one out of the Food52 Baking cookbook which I’m loving right now in it’s entirety.  The recipe is below so if you just popped over cause you saw these pics on Insta, go ahead and scroll to the bottom and I'll see you in a minute.

- Lord. 

For all of this creating and reading about creating and trying to learn about how to create and not live in fear and push on and press forward, I know that all creativity ultimately comes from you.  I would just like to acknowledge that.  For a moment I just need a little recalibration.  I'm reading this new book and it's been the most brilliant and affirming thing.  It’s also been the most annoying thing.  I’m doing my best to process the content with the eyes and heart of one who knows the creator of ALL things.  Because I know that’s who I am.  And I know that’s who you are.  All the little bits and pieces of wisdom in there have spoken so loudly over and against all of my insecurity in feeling like what I have to say is pointless or that I'm entirely late to the game and the opportunity has passed, on and on.  For the sake of your glory and my sanity, I’m glad you can use the most unsuspecting means to get me to hear what I need to hear, even when I really have to read between the lines.  And all total horse shit parts aside, I really needed to hear most everything in this book. 

I’m inspirationally stuffed at the moment.  I’ve over-served myself thinking it’s okay because at least it’s high quality but now I can’t move which is classic.  It's like I’ve been handed fistfuls of dusty gemstones but in order to see their value I need you to give them a gentle cleaning so as to see them in light of my truth about where all this comes from, which parts to put into play, and how to do that.  And I also need you to show me how not to crush myself with expectation in the process of doing that which is the total opposite of what I’m supposed to glean from all of it.  

Mostly I need help holding on to the notion of measuring success not in the traditional sense but by dedication.  By whether I wake up, get up, show up, and genuinely love what I do every day (because I really, really do and I'm so grateful for that) whether it’s seen or unseen, praised or hated, meaningful or entirely pointless.  I so sincerely hope that anything created out of inauthenticity fails miserably and that that failure simply serves as a compass to put me back on track.  And finally, on a side note, I know we’ve talked a lot about this but everyone’s ongoing relationship drama honestly makes me want to crawl under a rock.  All in your timing but please have mercy.  Thank you. -

Alright you can open your eyes now.  And for anyone living in the confusion and glory and fear of creating, cultivating, or starting anything at all on a regular basis, I can’t recommend Elizabeth Gilbert’s new book, Big Magic enthusiastically or hesitantly enough.  In so many ways, it’s probably exactly what you need to hear.

 
 

Blueberry Cornmeal Breakfast Cake (sans glutens)

This recipe is adapted from Food52 Baking.  Tierra Vegetables is one of my favorite Saturday morning stops at the market.  They sell vibrantly colored chile powders, pristine dried peppers, and freshly ground heirloom cornmeal blends, one of which I used for this cake but any finely ground cornmeal will do.  

 

Method

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees, butter the springform pan and line it with parchment.  Stir together the cornmeal, tapioca flour, baking powder, and remaining salt and set aside. In the bowl of a stand mixer beat the butter and remaining sugar on medium high speed until light.  Add the yolks and beat for an additional two minutes scraping down the sides once or twice.  Stir in the lemon juice and zest.  Add the dry ingredients and almond milk in three alternating additions beginning and ending with the flour mixture.  Combine the egg whites and half the salt in a mixing bowl.  Whisk until soft peaks form and slowly add 1/3 cup of the sugar.  Whisk for an additional minute and gently fold into the batter.   Pour half of the mixture into the pan and top with half of the blueberries.  Scrape remaining batter into the pan and top with remaining blueberries.  Bake for approximately 45-50 minutes or until a tester comes out clean.  Cool on a wire rack for 15 minutes.  Run a paring knife around the edge and remove the outer ring, and allow the cake to cool completely.  Freaking delicious the next day and the day after.  Keep it wrapped well in plastic.

Ingredients

3 eggs, separated
1/2 teaspoon kosher salt
2/3 cup coconut palm sugar, divided
1 1/2 cups fine ground cornmeal
1/4 cup tapioca flour (or any gf flour blend)
2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 cup butter, room temp
Zest of 1 large lemon
2 teaspoons lemon juice
1 cup almond milk
1 pint fresh blueberries